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I Loved Her But I Asked Her To Go Back To Her Boyfriend

( words)
*For representational purpose only.

I used to like a girl in college and she too liked me back but she was already in a relationship with someone else. I came to know about this only after we became good friends. But it was already too late, for I had started developing feelings for her. We would talk endlessly through chats and calls, even though she had a boyfriend.

I was disappointed when I heard that she was already involved with someone else but the spark between us didn't fade away even with this knowledge.

In fact, it grew more than before and we became closer than ever. 

I was attracted to her, but I hid my feelings because I didn't want them to disturb her relationship. But she had issues with her boyfriend, due to which she decided to part ways with him.

I couldn't see her cry so I spoke to her boyfriend about their relationship. I became friends with him and asked him to come to our college so that he could patch up with her. I don't know what I was thinking while doing this. I guess I just wanted to see her happy so bad that I was ready to do anything for her, even give her up for some other man.

But despite my efforts, their relationship didn't work out and they broke up. After this, she grew closer to me and we stayed like this for about a year. Then came Rohit. He was her friend and he used to like her. On her birthday, he re-entered her life and gifted her a watch. This gesture made me grow suspicious of his intentions and I asked her to maintain her distance from him. But he pursued her and started chatting with her more frequently.

I felt possessive and extremely jealous and we started fighting more often about this. Eventually, we stopped talking to each other.

But I couldn't stay away from her for long and planned a huge surprise for her on her birthday. I gave her 12 gifts, one each for every month of the year. Things turned back to normal but our relationship didn't feel the same. I felt as if she had changed somehow. I couldn't bear this and felt so frustrated that one day I scolded her for her behaviour. She blocked me after this. 

The next day we were in college and I was acting normal but I guess she couldn't see me smiling and behaving as if nothing had happened the night before. She confronted me and started quarrelling with me in front of everybody in college.

Then, she slapped me when I said that Rohit was the reason why I behaved that way with her. She began hating me after this and all I could think was that I had failed as a friend, as a lover and a protector.

I had helped her choose the right path with her ex and I had helped her stand up after her break up, but I had failed with Rohit and couldn't save her from his trap.

Later, Rohit came along with some of his friends when I was alone and tried to provoke me and begin a fight. But I stayed calm even when he caught hold of my collar. I just kept looking into her eyes while Rohit and his friends blabbered on. Then, she asked Rohit to stop and leave me alone. I could see on his face that he didn't expect this reaction from her. But eventually, both of them left. After a few months, she came into a relationship with him. I slipped into depression because I felt that she had chosen him over me. That's when I started working on myself. 

After a year, I came to know that Rohit left her because his parents didn't like her.  Does that mean that I suffered for nothing?

She still loves Rohit and I still love her but I don't want to go back to her because she fought with me for him.

In the end, I just want to say that no matter what happens in your life, stay strong, love yourself and know that you will be fine. You will grow from every experience, just have an open mind and a positive attitude. 

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