When he came back again in my life, I didn’t know that it is going to be more destructive for me than before. I met him during my MBA, and he was senior to me. At that time, I was a very talkative and chulbuli kind of girl who would always smile. I started talking to him as his junior, and soon we exchanged numbers and started talking every day. I am the kind of person who would never believe anyone easily, but I started believing him and shared everything about my life with him. I shared with him my family issues, that I was facing from my childhood. He would console me and try to make me happy.

With him, I really felt a connection beyond friendship. I started feeling for him, and I told him that. I felt some kind of unique connection between both of us.

He said that he also feels the same for me and loves me, but he can’t take it forward with us because of his family as I belong to a tribal community and he comes from an upper caste stature in his community. I didn’t feel bad as I know how our society works, and I also didn’t want to be the reason for his separation from his family because I know the pain of a broken family. I liked his honesty. He told me not to talk about our relationship with anyone, and I agreed.

We continued talking to each other, and meeting outside the college campus. One day, he called me to meet in class where he was alone.

We started talking about our assignments, and for a moment, we just looked at each other and had no words to say. It was my first kiss ever and I was very happy. Soon he got placed at a renowned corporate company. We both were very happy, but after some time passed, I felt that he was avoiding me. So I asked him the reason but he ignored me by saying that it was nothing like that. Then he left for his job and it was the first time when we were going to live far away from each other, and not going to meet each other. Those days were very upsetting for me but my friends and my studies kept me keep going.

I would call him daily but he always said that he was busy. I would feel bad but I tried to make myself understand that he must actually be busy.

I believed him blindly even though some of my classmates who had seen us together, warned me that he was not a good person. Believing in something just because someone has said it to me, is not my habit, so I ignored it. I also got placed in government organization, and soon I joined there. I would still call him but he never spoke to me properly. Then he started scolding me for calling him. One day he told me not to call him again as he loved someone else and he will marry only her. I cried and asked him what about what he had with me, and even though I accepted that we can’t be together, I had believed that we had love between us.

But he said that all of it meant nothing, so I should not call him ever again. He called me after a few days, and said that all he said was just a joke and he began talking very sweetly with me.

After some days, he started behaving rudely and scolded me for calling him, so I stopped and never called him again, without knowing what the reason behind this behaviour was. I spent most of my time simply crying all the time, and never shared it with anyone. During those days of loneliness, I met a guy and soon became friends with him, and one day he proposed to me. I told him about my past and said that I am not ready for it right now, but he requested me to take time and then decide. Later, he somehow managed to convince me for the relationship. But I never felt the same connection with him, as I felt in my first relationship.

Also he started controlling my decisions; he would fight with me if my plan was for home and not to visit him, if I had to go outside for my office work.

He doubted me every time. This annoyed me very much, so I decided to break up with him, but it took me one and half year to get out of the relationship as he threatened me every time. He also called my boss to talk shit about me, but I am grateful to my friend who was also my colleague and roommate, she supported me in this and helped me to get rid of him.

Read the next part here: I Will Never Know Why I Made The Same Mistake And Had The Same Heartbreak Twice

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