It was 4.30 a.m. Akshay and I were standing in the dark, away from everyone. The chirping of the birds had just begun and I could see the first rays of the sun. It was the final day of our college festival. The music playing the distance and the giggles of the students made their way to our ears. The final year students were enjoying every moment to the fullest because they knew that this time would not come back.

Amidst all these amazing moments, I dropped the plan of hanging out with my friends and joined Akshay for a walk around the campus, which he had desired for long.

Having danced the entire night and then walked across such a huge campus, my legs were aching badly and I needed rest. It was my first year; my first cultural fest and I couldn’t believe that I had so much fun. I wanted to stay longer despite knowing that it was time to return to my room. We sat on a rock under a tree.

Akshay was exhausted too but he didn’t utter a single word, as he loved spending time with me.

We’d been in a relationship for three months and he was not only an excellent friend but also a protective one, which was something I admired about him. After a while, the sound of the music faded and the chirping birds seemed to disappear. All I could hear was the sound of our breathing.

Akshay leaned towards me and looked at me. As I looked at him, I could hear a romantic song being played in the distance. He leaned forward and kissed me on my lips. At that point, my eyes were closed and I didn’t know what to do. For nearly 15 seconds or so, our lips were interlocked. Then I felt his hands touching my waist and slowly moving upwards.

Instantly, I opened my eyes and caught hold of his arms, but he didn’t stop.

When his hands continued moving upwards, I pushed him and asked him to control himself. He was shocked by my reaction and asked me to calm down, as it was my first time. I was perplexed when he said that it was my first time. I asked him “Am I not your first one?” He stuttered and I was left in shock. He confessed that he had two serious relationships in the past.

I couldn’t believe what he said because he had always claimed that I was his first love.

By then, the music had stopped and the scorching rays of the sun were burning my skin. I stood up to leave but he caught hold of my hand and pulled me down towards him. I sat with a thud on the rock and he grabbed my face and kissed me again. Horrified, I pushed him away with all my strength and slapped him hard across the face. I got up and ran across the ground with tears in my eyes.

I couldn’t see a single friend or known face standing on the ground.

I walked back to my room, where I saw my roommate sleeping and I didn’t want to disturb her. I sobbed silently under my pillow and didn’t realize when I dozed off.

“Aaradhya, Aaradhya, wake up. See what has happened in the group,” urged Reenu, my roommate. It was 11.30 a.m. She asked me to check our department's Whatsapp group. My phone was switched off, so I turned on the charger and went to brush my teeth. Reenu shouted again and asked me to immediately check the group chat.

I never paid attention to other’s matters, so I was in no hurry to check what had happened.

However, when I opened the group chat, I was shocked to see messages like “Can't believe Aaradhya would do such a thing”, “I knew she was a bitch”, “Good you left such a weirdo, Akshay.”

I scrolled up and saw that Akshay had written a long note that said, “Dear friends, hope you enjoyed the cultural fest. I enjoyed it too but I still can't believe what happened to me on the last day. Aaradhya asked me to take a walk with her around the campus.

Though I wanted to be with everyone and dance to a few more songs, she compelled me to go with her.

After walking a while, I said, ‘Let’s go back,’ but she refused and made me sit under a tree. We sat there and suddenly, she asked me to kiss her. I couldn’t believe what she’d said, so I pretended to ignore it and started talking about the fest.

But she asked again and promised me that she wouldn’t tell anyone.

When I said no, she became furious and got up to leave. She threatened to break up with me if I didn’t obey her. I was perplexed and didn’t know what to do, so I caught her hand and asked her to sit down. She sat down and winked at me. This time, I couldn’t control myself and shouted at her, warning her to stop this behaviour.

No doubt I was a bit loud but it was for our own good. But she stood up and slapped me. She said that I had no right to shout at her and she was breaking up with me. I tried to call her several times but she didn’t listen.

I don’t know what you'll feel but I did what was right according to me.

This incident has left a deep impact on me and I may not behave normally for a few days; I need some time to recover. Have a good day.”

After reading the conversation, I had no words to say. Reenu was looking at me, and I didn’t have the courage to look into her eyes. I buried my head in the pillow and started crying loudly. She tried to console me but I wanted to be alone.

She understood and left the room for a while. I tried calling Akshay but he didn’t answer the phone. I opened our last chat and saw two new messages, one sent at 6 a.m. and the other at 10 a.m. The first one said, “I will take revenge for this slap&rdquo.

The second message said, “You are gone baby, just gone.”

I felt helpless; I didn’t know what to do. Everyone knew him as the decent guy while I had a slightly negative image, so a majority of my classmates felt sympathetic towards him without knowing the real truth.

My image was negative because I was known to share everything with my parents.

This had led to complaints against two of my seniors for ragging, though it wasn’t ragging. When we joined college, the seniors had called our entire batch. They spoke to the boys in a slightly abusive manner while the girls were shown unnecessary love and respect. When two of my seniors singled me out, I got very scared, so scared that my cheeks turned red.

When they started asking me back-to-back questions, I couldn’t take it and burst into tears.

While one of them tried to calm me down, the other one shouted at me and that worsened the situation. At that very moment, my father called because he knew that we were going to have an interaction with the seniors. He was worried about me. He heard me crying and tried to calm me down. As he personally knew one of the professors in our college, a complaint was immediately lodged against the two seniors.

Since then, many of my batchmates fear to interact with me and call me ‘rotlu’ or ‘complaint master.’

Yes, I did share everything with my parents but I handn’t told them about Akshay. After joining college, some things changed, and there were a few things that I didn’t tell my parents. However, that day, I needed support so I called my mother. When I told her the issue, she started saying, “What have you done?” followed by a series of questions, which I wasn’t really comfortable in answering at that moment, “Why didn’t you tell us about Akshay?” “Why don’t you come home on weekends?” etc.

Instead of supporting me, my mother was furious that I’d not told them about Akshay.

She disconnected the phone saying, “I don’t know why you did such a thing.” My father was my only hope but when I tried to reach him, he disconnected the phone and texted me, “In a meeting, will call you at night beta.” I didn’t eat the entire day and had a tremendous headache.

I happened to see a few memes about me posted by my batchmates and that made me feel worse.

Towards evening, I tried calling my father but he disconnected the phone again. This time he sent me a long message that said, “I can’t believe that you would do such a thing. Why did you hide the truth? I did notice some changes when you went to college but this is unacceptable. I feel ashamed of what you’ve done.” I felt shattered when I read his message.

My own parents were not willing to believe me!

I tried to sleep but my eyes brimmed with tears. Reenu tried her best to console me, yet I couldn’t help myself. The next day in class was even more dreadful. I tried talking to Akshay but he kept himself surrounded by friends. Before I could even reach him, his friends started mocking me.

I was called various names and I could feel many of my friends turning away from me.

As the days passed, I started getting increasingly depressed. My health deteriorated and I grew thin and pale within a couple of days. I hardly smiled, barely spoke to anyone and stopped going out. All I did was sit at the window and stare mindlessly. My mother did call me a few times but she never told me to come home or asked me how I was doing.

It was a big issue for my parents because respect and sharing a truthful bond were very important for us as a family.

Amidst everything, there were two friends who stood by my side - Reenu and Rohan. Both of them tried their best to help me mingle with the rest of the group. I would always find excuses to stay away but they never stopped trying.

Whenever someone mocked me in class, Rohan and Reenu took my side.

After nearly 5 weeks, I started feeling better and opened up to them.

Meanwhile, Reenu was in a long-distance relationship and was facing her own issues. Slowly, she got busy in her own life and I was left with Rohan. Rohan was a gentle and sweet guy who told me to keep smiling because he believed that a smile takes away half of our worries. Gradually, our friendship grew stronger and so did my overall health.

We would talk for hours after our classes. Sometimes, he’d ask me to hang out with his group, which I denied initially but later, I voluntarily became a part of it. Soon, our group started teasing Rohan about me, which made him blush.

Though I realized that he had feelings for me, I did not acknowledge it because I was too scared to get close to someone again.

It was too early for me.Though I felt hatred towards Akshay, he was my first love and there was still a tiny part of me that admired him. Whenever Rohan flirted with me, I’d either ignore him or ask him to stop.

And he always understood me, which was the best thing about him. He maintained a boundary and never crossed it.

Over a period of time, we became very good friends. We would chat all night, walk together to classes, hang out in the evening and much more. I felt much better than before and it was only because of him. One evening while we were walking around the campus, he asked me “What really happened with Akshay?”

This question meant a lot to me since no one had bothered to know my side of the story; they blindly believed Akshay’s words.

I was unsure of telling him the truth but I decided to open up. As I started talking to him, my eyes filled with tears. He tried to wipe them away but I stopped him. He realized that I was uncomfortable, so he handed me his handkerchief. He made me understand that I should have opposed Akshay’s words; I shouldn’t have stayed silent.

We sat there for the next half hour and I felt lighter from within. He also encouraged me to speak to my parents and ask for forgiveness. He supported me and I called my mother to apologize.

I could sense her crying and I assured her that I would never hide anything from them again.

That evening I felt like the incident with Akshay had never happened; I was so elated after sharing everything with Rohan. When I returned to my room, Reenu said with a wink, “So, you’re back after talking to your majnu?” I felt butterflies in my stomach but the very next moment my heart wondered, “What if Rohan turned out to be like Akshay!”

I knew how depression felt and I didn’t want to go through that feeling again.

That night I didn’t chat with Rohan nor did I walk with him to class the next day. I didn’t talk to him at all. When he saw me, he rushed to check if something was wrong. I lied that I was feeling unwell and walked back to my room. For the next two days, I behaved in a similar manner.

I could see Rohan getting hurt but I was bound too.

At the end of the third day, Reenu asked me why I was ignoring Rohan. I didn’t have a reply to her question. When she asked me again, I broke down and confessed that I was trying to protect myself because I wasn’t ready to get hurt again. She calmed me down and explained to me that everyone is not the same. Rohan was better than all the other guys.

Reenu knew that I liked Rohan though I’d never confessed it to her.

I felt better after talking to her and texted Rohan. He replied immediately as though he was waiting for my message. He was worried and asked me what was wrong but I made an excuse about my health. Our conversation continued till dawn and we were back to our old routine.

The next day, Rohan showed me a picture of Ranveer Singh and Deepika Padukone and cutely said, “Here’s you” pointing towards Deepika “And here’s me,” pointing towards Ranveer. “We will look cute too, together.” When he finished that sentence, I was silent; I didn’t know what to say to him.

On one side, I liked him too but on the other, I still feared getting hurt.

Rohan broke my silence by saying, “Relax, I was just flirting with you!” and he burst into laughter. Then he stopped, looked at me intensely and said, “I know you are not ready now. I know you are scared that I might be the same as him. But Aaradhya, I am not like him and I am not going to ask or force you until and unless you are ready. But I will wait for you.”

His sincerity and determination made me realize that I needed him in my life.

The following day was my birthday, so a few of the girls from our group came to wish me a little before midnight.  Everyone started discussing Rohan and me. Reenu knew that I was blushing and she winked at me. Suddenly, one of my friends Anushka asked, “What if Rohan proposes to you tomorrow? Please don’t say no to him Aaradhya.” Her question took me by surprise and I fumbled for words.

I managed to ask, “Why would he do that?” Though I spoke confidently, I couldn’t stop blushing and smiling. Reenu couldn’t hide it any longer and told everyone that I had feelings for Rohan. Barely 10 minutes were left to my birthday when Anushka called Rohan and asked him to propose to me. He was surprised too and said that he was in no mood to joke. Anushka explained the entire situation to him.

So at around 11.55 p.m., he walked towards our hostel along with his friends. His friend had texted Anushka that Rohan wanted to be the first to wish me. So at 11.59 p.m., he called me down.

He started with a stutter but his friends hit him hard and he proposed to me in one go.

I was delighted and said, “This is my best birthday gift ever.” I could see him happily hugging his friends after hearing my response. Then he said, ‘I love you’ for twenty-one times, as it was my 21^st birthday.

Today, it has been 17 years since that day and he continues to say “I love you” in the same manner on every birthday.

Share This Story