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Dear Husband, Thank You For Showing Me That Not Every Man Is Heartless

( words)
*For representational purpose only.

I am 25 years old who is a proud wife and mother of a 1-year-old son.

My life was not like this before. There were lots of ups and downs. The biggest one was my affair with that a******.

When I was pursuing BA, my father met with an accident and I was heartbroken. But I had to stay strong for my family sake. I used to cry when there was no one around. Few days passed by and I tried to deal with things. I opened up my Facebook account and searched for an old friend whom I trusted since school time.

He was not in my friend list because my brother didn’t like to see me talk to boys.

But I needed support then, so I messaged him. I asked him how he was and he asked me the same. I opened up to him about my father’s accident and he seemed sad to hear that. Thereafter, he would continuously ask me about my father’s recovery and slowly, I got attached to him.

He tried to flirt but I ignored. Until one day, when he said that he loved me. I was shocked and said that he was being mad. He said, “Yes, tumhare pyaar mein. Haan nai bola toh mar jaunga.”

Mein dar gayi. But later I realised, it was all his tricks. I told him yes as I thought him to be a nice guy who genuinely cared for my father. Perhaps, he loved me truly. But I was wrong. He was just playing with my feelings.

Eventually, he started talking about s*x. I refused so he stopped talking to me and abused me. That was the first time I cried for him.

He blocked me from everywhere and I, somehow, managed to talk to him through my friend’s account. But he said that if I didn’t do what he wanted, he wouldn’t talk to me. I was so stupid and crazy for him then, that I agreed.

He started demanding more and more. One day, he asked for my pictures without clothes and again, I agreed. Because I knew if I didn’t, he would again stop talking.

Mein samaj hi nahi payi ki who sirf apni lust puri kar raha tha. And when I did everything he asked me to, he started ignoring and after few days, blocked me. I made another Facebook account just to stalk him and you wouldn’t believe what I saw in his profile. He got engaged a month ago when he blocked me.

I messaged him regarding the same and he said, “maine apni family se baat ki par woh mane nai. Isliye sagai ki dusri larki se.”

I clearly understood that he was lying. But just to be sure, I found a way to talk to his brother. He told me that his brother was a playboy and he had done the same thing with so many girls. He was having a love marriage and the biggest revelation was that he even used to have s*x with his Bhabhi.

I broke down completely and messaged him. Bahut sari gali di ussey lakin phir bh khud ko sambhal nai payi. I tried to kill myself. Every time I did, my family and their trust would stop me.

Papa abh itne bure accident se guzre the, already dil ke mariz hai…unhe aur taklif nai de sakti thi. I tried to smile in front of everyone.

But one day, my brother took my phone and found his messages. Ek baar toh woh mujhe thapad maar h deta, but then suddenly mein rote rote gir gayi. Shayad woh meri halat samaj chukka tha…mujhe uthaya aur kaha, “ab samjhi kyu mana karta hu boys se baat karne ke liye.”

He asked me for his address but I didn’t give just for the sake of my father. My brother would do anything just to see me smile. Soon he got engaged and I got busy preparing for his marriage. There I found my husband (my didi’s devar). Matlab mil toh pehle h gaye the par uss waqt haal kuch aur tha. He was only my friend.

I came to know that he had just broken up with his girlfriend and I thought for a while that tute dil ko sahara mil gaya. But my past kept me away from him and I started ignoring him.

The more I tried to avoid him, God made more plans to make us meet.

There was a kua pujan of my sister’s son and I met him at the function again. What he did next was amazing. He held my hand in front of everyone and took me to dance. But he never touched me after that again. Then after two months, he was very sad and so messaged me about his problems. He also asked me not to share it with anyone else. I think wahi se hamara rishta shuru hua.

He used to talk to me whenever he felt bored or had any problem.  

I think unka mere upar vishwas ban chukka tha. After four or five months later, he did something truly amazing. He asked me for marriage. I refused. He said, “Aapke papa bh razi ho jayenge.” So I said that if my father agreed, I would say yes too.

From that point, he did everything to make my parents say yes for our marriage. His love for me changed my life completely.

Now as I write this, I complete two years of my marriage and I can at least say this –

Har aadmi bura nai hota. I love you, jaan!

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