My Dear Daughter, I Hope I Can Teach You These 11 Things Before Life Happens To You

Chandana  Sahoo Chandana Sahoo in Tumse Ho Payega on 28 November, 2016

I was born when you came into this world – you have given birth to the mother in me. My prayers are always centered on your well-being and I so wish your life to be a smooth roll.

Like the Chinese adage, 'One generation plants the trees, and another gets the shade', I want you, my daughter to enjoy the shade of the tree planted by my mother.

Here are eleven pieces of wisdom that I intend to pass on to you, my baby.

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1. Inner beauty is pivotal and surpasses the outer sheen

And so invest in cleansing your soul and bettering yourself as a human being. It is absolutely okay to be conscious of your looks and take pride in your beauty, but it will fade away and wither with time. It is not everything you should care about. A kind, compassionate and thoughtful person is indeed the most beautiful.

If you are dark and ugly inside, you will be awful and will be despised.

2. Family is your backbone 

Your first relationships are forged in your family and it is where you grow up, right from the very initial moments of your life. You are showered with unconditional love by your parents and siblings and you will never be judged by them – no matter how hard you come across as. Cement that bond with your family and keep it safe and cocooned.

For if you are not able to do justice to these relationships, there is little chance that you would be able to do justice to any other.
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3. Be the epitome of values you so want your kids to imbibe

Women are by and large, the epicenter of every household and carry the responsibility of passing on good morals, values and upbringing to their kids. The copycats that children are, they are sure to take after you. They will be your reflection and so conduct yourself the way you want them to carry on in their lives, and you will not be disappointed.

If you fail to do this, you will have no one else to blame for your children's future, and you will have to live with it.

4. This is life, and unfortunately it is not going to be a cakewalk

Trials and tribulations will keep surfacing time and again, just to test your mettle and resolve. Do not let them overwhelm you. Keep striving hard and you will be crowned with success, sooner or later. After all, the real joy lies in the journey and not in the destination.

Savour the odyssey of life – it will enrich you in myriad ways with its thought-provoking lessons.

5. When in a relationship, do not lose your identity

Love is a beautiful feeling and a relationship is supposed to make you feel secure and strong about yourself. You should have no reason to succumb to his interests and habits, putting your own in the grave. If he is the right one, he will love you and every other desire and interest of yours. If not, you are yet to find your best half – this world does not lack marvellous boys who would respect and appreciate your whims and inclinations.

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Wait for the right one patiently.

6. Voice your opinion

Each one of us is born with a gifted mind and so are you. You will be signalled by this very same mind when things are going astray – do not shy away from speaking up then.

When treated in an unfair way, or subdued, exercise your right and stand up for yourself!

7. Be careful in choosing your girlfriends – they can be the mean lot

There are girls who can be your soul mates for life and then if you are unlucky, you will stumble upon that breed of cruel and mean, jealous and petty ladies. They will try to befriend you with their sugarcoated talks – squeeze out all benefits while pretending to be your friend and then you will finally be back-stabbed.

Be prepared to be let down at times and you will not be crushed. Look out for yourself.

8. And then, some girlfriends can be the saviours – they will be there when you need them the most

Girls can be horrible – and so when you chance upon that loyal friend, caress the relationship – nurture the bond and cling on to her for life. Return the favors by being a true, honest and devoted friend – and your friendship will bloom with time.

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Boys will pop in and move out of your life, but a good girlfriend will stand by you through your rough, dark and grey patches too.

9. Material pleasures will not fetch you that smile always

You own those Dior and Prada accessories and numerous DKNY outfits. The trendy shoes and headbands appeal to you so much and you grab them at the first chance. But do remember – these are things and they will perish. You will lose them eventually.

It is wiser to be content at heart and be happy with what you possess – rather than going after hoarding more and more.

10. Prioritise yourself – you deserve your own love and care

It is inherent in women to try and seek approval from others. But, bear this in mind – it is next to impossible to please everyone. You will be liked by some and not all.

So, rather than chasing people in a means to make them accept you, love thy self.

11. Come what may, Mamma will always be there for you

You are my baby – I have nurtured you in my womb for nine long months – we share that exceptional bond that we share with none. The umbilical cord may have been snapped, but we will always remain connected at our hearts always. Nothing in this whole wide world is more important to me than you, my love. Whenever you need that comforting hug and morale boosting assurance, your Mother will always be around, eager to cuddle you.

Whether on earth or up above, I will never leave your side, and you will always be able to feel me.